I’m so over 2020!  To say this year has been calamitous would be putting it mildly. I find myself slowing turning into a curmudgeon and my greatest fear is that the darkness that lies in my heart will fully consume the good. I caught myself today sending a text message to my family starting with, “Listen all you well….”. That happens to be a line from the movie Maleficent before she puts the curse on baby Aurora. Our family dinners of late seem to be one episode after another of Festivus. This is an airing of grievances that the character George Costanza’s dad, on the show Seinfeld, created. Literally, our family could have a top rated reality show that would be entitled Fraggin’ Out With the Franks. However, as absurdly dark as all this may seem, on the eve of Thanksgiving- I’m reminded that I couldn’t be more grateful to call these characters my family. As much as this pandemic has cast a shadow on us all- it has also shown us just how much we need to be grateful for these minor annoyances. After all, I would much rather be irked by their presence than to be devastated by their absence.

As we quickly approach the 12th and final month of this most memorable year, I’m attempting with the grace of God to gather what was good. Fall has always been my favorite season; however it’s presenting like a metaphor literally and figuratively for the bitter and cold dark days that will surely come and the ways I frequently feel like I am “falling” into despair. Some days are better than others, and I often vacillate between laughing and crying- daydreaming and trying to wake up from what seems to be a nightmare. It’s as if we are coasting through our days on a raft like Tom Hanks in the movie Castaway- barely clinging to life. It’s odd what humans can become accustomed to over time. Like his character, you can get used to being starved, cold, weary, isolated and numb. The problem with this is that human beings weren’t designed for this type of prolonged fatigue. Eventually, we begin to breakdown physically, emotionally, and mentally. Despite seeing a ship far out in the distance, like the vaccine we hope will save us all- we’re simply hanging on for the night. What began as the twilight in March of this pandemic has now slipped into the middle of one of the darkest nights that will prove for many to be the winter of their discontent.

With time, the hard freeze that has clutched the ground with it’s frosty cloak will soften it’s grip and give way to new life. This will signal that spring is coming. A time for renewal and planting seeds that will in turn yield a beautiful garden. This garden can represent our minds, attitudes, and ways of thinking. If we take care of our gardens- the harshest of winters won’t affect us, because we know that it all is just temporary. If we incorporate gratitude into our daily lives- even the smallest of things become miracles. “Wear gratitude like a cloak and it will feed every corner of your life.”- Rumi

Inevitably, summer will return and we will once again feel the warmth of balmy rays upon our faces. Taking care of our mental health and being patient and kind to one another through our cruel winter will bring forth the reward and prized gardens we desire. 2 Corinthians 10:5 states, “Your mind is a garden, your thoughts are the seeds. You can grow flowers or you can grow weeds. Take every thought captive.” I’m slowly understanding that it’s not necessarily our circumstances that upset us- it’s our thoughts and reactions to these circumstances that will make all the difference in the world.

What seeds are you planting in your garden? Maybe my family is not annoying me, it is the way that I’m choosing to react to my uneasiness surrounding the uncertainty in this world. In fact, I’m loving this chance to spend more quality time with them. Perhaps I’m not breaking down, but instead this challenge is allowing me the opportunity to build up my tolerance and patience. I’m actually loving all this free time. Could it be that I’m not isolated from friends, but closer as a result of this pandemic, because now I am writing to them all and sharing my stories. Let us enter a season where we continuously sow and water the seeds of gratitude, patience, and kindness- to make sure that our gardens can grow healthy and beautiful under any kind of weather. Be compassionate with yourselves and others as we are living in some of the most unprecedented times. On this Thanksgiving eve, remember who and what really matters. I am beyond grateful for my family, friends, faith, and for never forgetting to have fun! Aren’t you weary of wrestling in the garden of good and evil. We’re going to make it out of this “season” and year stronger and wiser. Remember, make sure to water only that which you intend to grow. Happy Thanksgiving!

Speaking Frankly,

JD Frank