It was a crisp fall day and the leaves slowly fell to the ground as the sky was illuminated with brilliant colors of red and gold- as if to match the leaves that still clung to the trees. My mother was driving my brother to his Taekwondo lessons with me in tow, in the backseat quietly daydreaming and examining the sky. My favorite part of the day has always been dusk. A short interval of time that seems like God’s way of covering us with a beautiful blanket displayed in the sky before night. Dusk is so fleeting that one must stop and take the time to be fully present to absorb its glory before it vanishes into night. The same applies to the season Fall. They both remind me of polite and quiet visitors that present you with a lovely gift and never overstay their welcome. Dusk and Fall would later be a metaphor of the beauty in life that is fragile and finite, the importance of living in the present moment, and ultimately the hard lesson of knowing when to let go- just like the trees who release their leaves graciously to the ground below. What seemed like an ordinary autumn night watching my brother at his martial art lesson- turned into one of the greatest lessons of my life and a course in transformation.As we walked into the dojang to greet Soo Kim, a ninth degree Grandmaster, who is only 1 of 300 worldwide- I asked him the most curious question. Posted on the wall of his modest dojang was a quote painted in large black print that stated, “Nothing is impossible to a willing mind.” Something deep inside compelled me to ask Master Soo Kim why did he begin the quote with a negative word and instead say, “Anything is possible to a willing mind.” At that time, he was probably in his late twenties and I was a spunky and funky 11 year old girl. With a wicked grin, dashing good looks, and a softness in his eyes, he responded with a Confucius-level quip and turned away to start class. What my young mind ascertained from the wisdom he dropped on me that day was that just because things start off negatively- they can end positively. Obviously, that was an over simplification of a deeper meaning that life would soon show me just how deep the rabbit hole could go. As the years progressed, I never forgot that quote and the meaning grew more profound with time.There is a study that shows for every 5 compliments we receive as human beings- it only takes 1 negative comment out of that 5 to adversely affect us and it will be the one that will have a more intense and lasting impact on us. Unfortunately, this is true in my experience. For example, when I post a picture on social media and I receive compliments like, “beautiful, gorgeous, pretty, cute” it will be the comment “interesting” that is the negative take away. I have been guilty of over analyzing remarks left on my page and wondering whether or not the comment was meant to be an intentional slight or just an awkward gaffe. Why is it that darkness seems to over-power the light in so many areas of life? As many of you know, 2019 was what I consider to be one of the worst years of my life- with a health scare resulting in surgery, job dissatisfaction, the Herculean task of planning a large scale event over the span of 6 months, and an overall uneasiness about where I was in my life. My dreams seemed to have all but dried up like a raisin in the sun. I felt like time was speeding up and the buzzer was about to sound- marking the end of the “game.”The beauty of all that weight is that it became too much to bear and I broke down. What remained was everything that was real. The breakdown lead to a breakthrough. The mask that I had carefully crafted over the decades had shattered into a million pieces and couldn’t possibly be repaired. I decided not to make a new one, but instead live my life 100% on my terms. I quit my job, I slowly began to shed layers of life that no longer served me from friendships to setting boundaries that were long overdue. Entering 2020 with hope for a fresh start, I soon realized that this year would also present a multitude of challenges and I couldn’t keep waiting for a new year to hit the reset button. Only I am responsible for my life and no one was coming to save me. Curve balls being thrown my way was becoming a way of life and learning how to adapt was too. That quote on Master Soo Kim’s wall popped into my head one winter night and the meaning resonated with me to my core. Negative experiences are inevitable in life, but we can transmute these dark times into life lessons and thus open the curtains to let the light shine. “I had to make you uncomfortable, otherwise you would have never moved.”-GOD“To realize one’s destiny is a person’s only obligation.” -The Alchemist. This book speaks of a boy’s journey to find a treasure that was not out there in the world, but instead in the journey itself and within. In my 46 years living on this planet- I’ve had a beautiful, full, and amazing life! However, like everyone else, I’ve tasted the bitter fruit of pain, loss, betrayal, disappointment and all forms of dreams deferred. The key is that out of the darkness comes the morning light. Had it not been for the rough seas- we wouldn’t appreciate the calm waters.My life has been a journey of discovering the treasure within. My spirit is still filled with that spunky girl who had the nerve to ask the Grandmaster about that transformative quote on the wall. It’s not until 35 years later that I understand the totality of, “Nothing is impossible to a willing mind.” I’ve taken the negative experiences of my life and transmuted them into jewels of wisdom. I try to live my life in the now, knowing that just like dusk and the season Fall- they are fleeting. Last but not least, I’ve learned to let go like the leaves on the trees. Sometimes we must shed what no longer serves us to live out our true purpose. I suppose had I not experienced all those challenges- I wouldn’t be writing this blog that I’ve so desperately sought to do. So thank you God for sustaining me through it all and thank you Life for the pressure to be transformed into a diamond. My wish for you all is to live your life to the fullest and find the beauty even in the dark.Speaking Frankly,Janay Durand Frank